Hot Sweaty Mess
I'm not sure if I should be offended or concerned. Everyone reading this is encouraged to help me out by leaving a comment below.
My mother-in-law, bless her red-headed soul, loves to pass along information via electronic mail. Over the years, I have been notified of freeway closures, community events, and cancer-causing food products. I have also chuckled at pictures of redneck weddings, scoffed at questionnaires that predict my "real age," and belly-laughed at videos involving family pictures and dancing elves.
Yesterday she sent me a link to a health-related story. The headline reads:
Night Sweats in Middle-Aged Man: His cheesy-smelling sweat (link)
Granted, I am not middle-aged. But I have been known to sweat. And I have also been known to fancy myself a string cheese snack. I also consumed two cheese crisps before retiring to my bed last night.
In rapid-fire retaliation, I blasted off a response to her link:
I don't know why you would have sent this to me. My night sweats smell of lavender and honeycomb. My day sweats smell of jasmine and cherry blossom.
It felt good to stand up for my pristine odor. But now I'm having second thoughts.
Maybe there's a reason nobody sits next to me in biology class.
Help.
